Most people dream of graduating college and finding the perfect job. Whether that is the Peace Corp, a 9-5 office job or something similarly prestigious and balanced, I highly doubt that anyone actually dreams of selling paper door-to-door. Fortunately or unfortunately, the year I graduated college, I was desperate to find a job in Nashville, TN and ended up spending a year selling paper and office supplies door-to-door. It was like The Office. But, you know, not as cool.

Regardless of the abject misery I felt that year, most of my best funny stories come from my haphazard experience peddling paper. Here are five interesting snippets of what happened to me that year:

Credit: Wikipedia Commons

  1. One rainy winter day in McMinnville, I was surrounded by a herd of less-than-friendly goats who proceeded to eat all of my paperwork and a piece of my coat sleeve. Fending them off with my crutches did no good whatsoever. In fact, I’m pretty sure the goats took it as a challenge.
  2. I broke my hip during a morning “warm-up game.” Then, I walked around on it for two weeks. The story ends with a catastrophically traumatic visit to the McMinnville Emergency Department. Shockingly (or not?), sales went up in the two months that I was crutching around.
  3. An older gentleman who owned a security glass repair shop in Franklin told me that I was the “most interesting woman [he] had ever met.” It was uncomfortable.
  4. A pet shop gave me a rabbit. For free. I don’t sell paper anymore, but the bunny is still alive and well.
  5. On a “business trip” to Memphis (the bizarre circumstances under which this company ran “business trips” is a story for another day), the girl with whom I was partnered had a major mental health crisis. It was terrifying and put me off business travel for life.